The Last Few Laps

I’m used to my usual creative cycle; my momentum comes and goes. Sometimes I can draw lots of comics really quickly and sometimes I can’t. What’s been strange recently is how much momentum I’ve built up this fall. The comics have been speeding by. That was great, but the slowing down part is the part that I am having a little bit of trouble with.

It feels now like I should be stopping to preserve my enthusiasm for the comic, but I was going too fast and I just can’t stop making comics. Every time I sit down I think, “So, what about that next comic?” Then once I’m thinking about it I have to look at it, and then if I think of something to do I have to do it, because that’s what I’ve been doing all the time for weeks.

So half the time I’m feeling like, this is great. I’m getting comics done. And half the time I’m afraid if I don’t stop soon I’ll sprain my brain. So basically what I’m trying to do is make sure I’m actually inspired to work instead of just working because I think I should.

I guess if I were to describe it in terms of steamrollers, I got so excited I started jumping over steamrollers because they weren’t going fast enough. So now I’ve got even more steamrollers behind me than usual and they’re going too fast for me to jump to the side. Or something.

But really it’s because I can see the end of this race and I want to get to it. When I’m working this fast I can see the story going by and I can see the end approaching. I can imagine being done.

It’s not that I don’t like drawing The Elves of LleuGarnock. It’s that when I started it, the thing that I wanted to prove to myself was that I could finish something. I’m excited about reaching that goal, and I’m excited about moving on to other projects.

I’ve felt this before, but this time it’s so close. I know it’s not true, but I’ve been feeling like if I just sit down and push through it, I can finish this story without needing to take another break.

Once I hit the bottom of my creative productivity cycle, I’m sure it will seem far away again. I’m not worried about that. I’m worried about the next time I’m on this high, and whether I will rush through the really important parts of the story without being inspired, just to reach my goal.

I guess I’ll get to that when I get to it.

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